TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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