Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Randomize
