i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
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