he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
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