I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
