we're blogging at a bar
how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
