You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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