I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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