But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
this just has baby written all over it
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
Randomize