i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
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