Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Randomize
