do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
Since you didn't call me back last night, I can only assume that in 9 months you're going to have a child that I'm going to refer to as, "Daddy's little mistake in Miami."
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
Randomize
