I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
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