I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
Randomize
