She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
Randomize
