My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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