Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
Randomize
