My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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