what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
I was gonna be Romantic and write your name in emoji eggplants but A's are hard
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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