you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
Randomize
