you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
