Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize