HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
I think I gave the bachelor party directions to the breweries next to my dentist so that they could take me to my appointment and pick me up afterward...
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
Randomize