Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize