If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
Randomize
