So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
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