I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
Randomize
