that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
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Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
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