Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Randomize
