I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
Randomize
