I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
Randomize
