You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
All the doctor said was why
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
Randomize
