I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
A dude just looked at me like my drunk swaying was corrupting his progeny DUDE YOUR KID HAS A MULLET YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED HIM
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
Randomize