The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
We're too hungover to prance.
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