you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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