i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
