i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
Randomize