Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.