Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
