Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
he high fived his dick after we had sex
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