kristin has been a bad kristin
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
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