dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
