and the officer said have you been drinking
and i said NOO SIR.
and he said, I am a woman.
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
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