Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
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