Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
This martini tastes like the bartender stirred it with his foreskin.
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
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