Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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