Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
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