once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
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