You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
Randomize