I want to stick my p in your. b.
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
