You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize